The Struggle Is Part Of The Story

Writing this post somehow hits home more so than all my others, maybe because it is more personal and really exposes a side of myself that not alot of people want to have exposed. I have only been single for about 4 months now after a short relationship before that and many more before that one. Call it what you will, "serial dater," "she can't be alone," and I cant even think of all the other possibilities but what I find is that through all my horrible dating experiences, although they have been very rough at times, I am able to share with others out there that I truly believe it happens to the best of us and pushes us to not lose the love for yourself. As a society, we women dream of the fairy tale prince, the one that will sweep us off our feet, the guy that shows up to our work with flowers or surprises us on our doorstep in the rain holding a sign reading "To me you are perfect." To us, our Mr. Darcy could be the man we walk by in the grocery store, an old classmate we never connected with, or even the boy next door.

I am 25 and I have had the blessing (yes, it has truly been a blessing) to have endured more heartbreak and loss than most. The countless tear spells, the sunken pit in the stomach feeling after a breakup, the loss of someone I gave a piece of my heart to. I work with a group of women that most don't and won't ever have the blessing of having, a support system that together could probably write the best book telling our stories of the men of our past, the present and the hopeful ones of our future. And although I may be single, uninvolved and alone for the time being, I know that I grow in this time more so than any other time, growing alone, bettering myself for the person that will come along when the time is right. It hurts at times, finding out the guy is talking to another girl, saying he will call than doesn't, going on your facebook and finding out the guy you were seeing all of sudden has acquired a girlfriend in the 12 hours you weren't talking (yes, this has happened.) Those guys exist more so than not, but one thing I have realized in the most recent of times is that meeting a good man can happen. The ones that make you laugh to put a smile on your face, call you just to check in on you and make sure your day is going alright, or are there to take your mind off of a bad day at any hour.

Through everything I have gone through, I have realized now more than ever that IT IS OK to be alone, to experience life for yourself before adding in a male counterpart, loving yourself in a way that you can only hope someone will do for you at some point in time. The idea of what a woman today finds to be a perfect man has become distorted, not realizing what real romance truly is. We are scared to be alone when really to be honest we sometimes can be more fabulous on your own.

All there really is to say is, " If your feeling frightened about what comes next, don't be. Embrace the uncertainty. Fall in love with yourself, inside and out. Allow it to lead you places. Be brave as it challenges you to exercise both your heart and your mind as you create your own path toward happiness; don't waste time with regret. Spin wildly into your next action. Fall in love every chance you get. Enjoy the present, each moment, as it comes, because you'll never get another one quite like it. And if you should ever look up and find yourself lost, simply take a breath and start over. Retrace your steps and go back to the purest place in your heart . . . where your hope for the good lives. You'll find your way again. And always remember the struggle is part of the story."

Xoxo

Jessica Leigh

The Cashew Wedding

I have been blessed to attend some beautiful weddings thus far in my life and fortunately enough two of them have been those which were my siblings in which I gained a lovely sister and a sarcastic charismatic brother in law. I've attended, participated and assisted in the weddings of my close friends and coworkers and I am especially excited to have been recently asked to help coordinate one of my good friends weddings coming up this summer. Caption you say? Well, when you blend a Jewish groom and a Catholic bride you end up with exactly that - a cashew wedding! Nothing but the best and certainly already know it will be nothing short of entertaining. My friend Hannah always has displayed such grace and charm when carrying herself. Shes the girl that walks into the room, lights it up and people just naturally gravitate towards her. Her smile can stop a train, and her fiance' Tatum is honestly one of the most genuine and down to earth men that I have ever had the experience of knowing. Hannah and I can be goofy at times, well all the time really, consuming too many watermelon spritzers at a birthday party or ordering the XXXL pizza and trying to convince Tatum we will eat it all. We've known each other since our freshman year of college and I can remember the day she met Tatum out at the school track while we were running stadiums. He has been there for both of us in times of need and times of hardship and I cannot express how happy I am to watch these two grow not only in life but in love. Constantly pushing her to be better, Hannah works with the widely known wedding blog website called Style Me Pretty, and has grown into a rare gem of a woman. By her side, Tatum has driven her to follow her creative lifestyle to the end of the road, dream the biggest dreams you can and never ever give up on what you love. Being surrounded by a team of talented women at Style Me Pretty, Hannah decided to simply use her daily inspiration from them and create a wedding on her own, doing all the planning and tedious details with just the help of her coworkers and friends along the way. We had lunch last week, discussed flowers, color palettes and table settings. Laughed a little, cried over our stressful lives and then realized that each day is a new day to move forward and better yourself. Not every wedding needs to cost an arm & a leg, stress you out to the point where you aren't enjoying it and believe it or not she is planning this wedding for 75 all under $15,000. Can she do it? With the help of 3 married women, 2 single gals, and Van her amazingly flaming baker friend that we all cannot seem to ever get enough of, we think and we will make it happen. I have created an inspiration board of what we had put together of what shes looking at for the big day and I cannot wait to see what we come up with for the finished product. Congrats to Hannah & Tatum again! My heart is filled with so much joy for you two and can't wait to see your love blossom & flourish even more so than it already has! Cheers to you two!

Xoxo

Jessica Leigh

To all the Brides who find themselves awake at 2 A.M., Googling birdcage veils and signature cocktail recipes. May this be a place of happy. A celebration that you, my lovely, are getting married. To the one you adore. And the wedding will be spectacular. . . because he'll be standing up there waiting for you to say " I do."

Blush & Gold Tone Place Setting

Flower Crown Alternative

Barn Style Wedding w/ Rustic Feel

Heavy Rose Alter

Porsche Getaway Car = LOVE

Sparkle Cinderella Shoes

Romantic Light Invitations

PostSecret

Happy Tuesday everyone! It already feels like it should be Friday simply based on how bad my feet are hurting from work and we are only halfway through the week! I don't know how many of you out there are big on reading before bed time or are interested in books in general but I thought that this was definitely worth sharing. Growing up, my Mom always was supportive of my reading habit and had no issue taking a trip down to our nearest bookstore and purchasing any series of books I was interested in. I'll never forget her showing up back home with the whole Little House In the Big Woods series by Laura Ingalls Wilder. I was ecstatic. It set me up to appreciate and have a drive to read books. I could honestly sit in a bookstore for hours now, flipping through the pages of a novel or marveling over the glossy prints of model homes, travel books that expose my inner bohemian and even the cookbooks filled with confections and treats so yummy looking I could literally eat them from the pages they are contained within. I can sometimes get a little carried away, stacking a pile high and thinking to myself, "Ok, you can pick one." But to get to the point, I was going through my collection and came across some amazing books that I love that are part of a series called "Postsecret." If you have never heard of them, you can access there website at www.postsecret.com and read the full story within their page. All in all, it is a project and online community started by a gentleman by the name of Frank Warren. He began handing postcards out and leaving them in the most public of places, asking for people to share a secret they have never shared with anyone else and to deliver it to him through the mail, anonymously. He created a movement, exposing peoples individual aspirations, fantasies, and frailties, encompassing our "common humanity." With over 180,000 secrets displayed to the public via the website and within the books, it has created an addictive read, allowing people to find themselves within the pages of his books and connecting on a more than intimate level than ever imagined.

I wanted to share this with everyone because I personally have connected with many of these and I only hope that you can too, simply finding an outlet and connecting with a person you don't even know and allowing oneself to understand that everyone in this world is going through something and on their own journey to peace and happiness. Below are a few of my favorites. Some may make you laugh, others will make you cry but I can promise that it will touch your heartstrings like it obviously has touched so many others.

Xoxo

Jessica Leigh